seeing myself through new eyes

spent the day at my mom’s today going through stuff. she’s moving next month and we just need to get rid of as much crap ahead of time as humanly possible. there was a box (from the last move – sigh) that was a mix of papers, cards, even some old photos. there was a couple of old school pictures of me, 3rd and 4th grades I think.

I’ve never really liked those pictures. from the time I got them back in school, all I could see was what I considered my flaws – teeth that were too big, hair that was limp and lifeless, too many freckles. I saw myself as ugly.

today, for the first time, I realized how wrong I was.

I had believed I was ugly.

oh, as I got older and passed the gawky middle school stage, I knew I “cleaned up nicely” and wasn’t unattractive. But I didn’t see myself as pretty, or cute, or beautiful. Which means I still saw myself as ugly, even if I wasn’t admitting it to myself or anyone else.

today I looked at those old photos and for the first time, I saw a pretty little girl.

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